Tuesday, December 7, 2010

Missing Paul


What I Miss

Eleven years didn’t erase him.
He is still with me everyday.
The memories haven’t dimmed.
His face, his body, his buzzed hair
are clearly visible in my mind.

I miss his sounds,
hearing him play
his music
as his bent fingers
lightly trickled up
and down the keyboard,
hearing his footsteps
on the stairs,
on the hardwood floors
as he prowled
around the house at night,
hearing his deep voice
as he said, “hello”
when he came home from work

I also miss his expertise.
He’d work on our computer problems at night
and leave carefully written instructions
in childish printing
for us to find the next morning.

I don’t miss his smoking,
I don’t miss his bad moods
during his last few years,
I don’t miss that his sickness
sometimes made him angry
and me angry at him.
No, I don’t miss those things.

But, I don’t think about them.
I just think about the things about him
that I miss.

Here's information everyone should know about. We certainly didn't.

National Suicide Prevention Lifeline

If  you feeling desperate, alone or hopeless, call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK (8255), a free, 24-hour hotline available to anyone in suicidal crisis or emotional distress. Call for yourself or someone you care about. The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline is:
  • Free and confidential
  • A network of more than 140 crisis centers nationwide
  • Available 24/7

For more information and how to get involved go to:
http://www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org/
 

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