Kathleen
Pooler was guest here last November and happily agreed to bring her
memoir writing wisdom back again. Please welcome Kathleen to Choices. I'm sure
you're like me and can't wait to read her memoir once it's launched.
I
look forward to your reading Kathleen's six writing tips.
Six Tips for Honoring the Story Within: A
Memoir Writer’s Challenge
By Kathleen Pooler
“Your
sacred place is where you find yourself again and again.”
Joseph Campbell
Writing a memoir is
hard work.
I know because I
have been writing mine for the past four years.
That’s not counting
the vignettes I started writing about thirteen years ago and the journaling
I’ve done since I was a preteen. But I didn’t get serious about my memoir
writer’s journey until 2009 when I started memoir writing workshops and started
attending regional and national writing conferences.
It’s very humbling
to learn what you don’t know, and when I started out, I knew nothing about
writing a memoir. I only knew I had a story inside me I wanted to write about
it.
It’s a well-known
fact in memoir writing circles that writing a memoir is a daunting task fraught
with many challenges, not the least being:
* Excavating
painful memories
* Standing in your truth
* Dealing with
family members or close friends who may not agree with your perception of the
truth.
All that on top of
a market that says you have to be a celebrity to sell your story. Granted, some
of this is changing with digital publishing but the fact still remains—getting
your memoir into the hands of readers remains a challenge.
The odds of writing
a memoir that sells can feel pretty overwhelming.
But readers love
stories they can connect with and we all have a story to share.
How can we honor
these stories?
Here are six
tips I’ve learned to counteract these odds and honor the story within:
Tip #1: Connect
with your purpose for writing.
Be clear
about why you want to write your
story. Do you want to leave a legacy for your grandchildren or are you
determined to seek mainstream publication? Either way is fine. You just need to
be clear on your purpose.
Connecting with
your purpose for writing the story only you can tell, allows you to have a
story to tell.
Tip #2: Put your
inner critic in his/her place.
We all have that nagging voice inside
that tells us we can’t write; no one will
be interested in our story and who cares anyway? Find a way to silence that
voice so you can get on with the work of writing. I wrote out this dialogue
with my inner critic which helped me.
Tip #3: Find your
authentic voice.
Keep writing until you find the story
that is begging to be told and once you find it, believe in it. I found this to
be the most challenging part. Once I started writing vignettes, the story
unfolded and took on a life of its own. I found my voice through writing and
rewriting.
Tip #4: Commit to
excellence in every step of the process.
Study your craft and seek professional
guidance along the way—writing mentors, editors, publishing experts
(traditional and self-publishing), marketing experts. You can always do it
yourself if you know what is expected in each phase of the process and are sure
you can meet these expectations with excellence.
Tip #5: Develop a
tough skin:
Be open to having your work critiqued
honestly and constructively by readers and writers you respect.
Rejection is part of the process. Figure out a way to get over it and
get on with the work at hand. Here are two links about not giving up:
- “Don’t Give Up” Seth Godin’s blog
- “7 Steps for Handling Rejection” on Charlotte Dixon Rain’s blog
Ask others –besides your family—to be
beta readers for your work-in-progress. Joining Joe Bunting’s Story Cartel
has been one of the wisest investments I’ve made. I recently sent my
work-in-progress memoir to my second round of beta readers as a result of the
encouragement received from Joe and other writers in The Story Cartel Course. I
also have developed a whole new network of fellow writers and prospective
readers. We help promote one another.
Do what it takes to
take care of yourself so you can take care of your writing.
Honor the story within.
Not only does it deserve to be told, it deserves to shine.
Kathleen's bio
Kathleen Pooler is a writer and a retired Family Nurse
Practitioner who is working on a memoir and a sequel about how the power of
hope through her faith in God has helped her to transform, heal, and transcend
life’s obstacles and disappointments:
domestic abuse, divorce, single parenting, loving, and letting go of an
alcoholic son, cancer and heart failure to live a life of joy and contentment.
She believes that hope matters and that we are all strengthened and enlightened
when we share our stories.
She blogs
weekly at her Memoir Writer’s Journey blog: http://krpooler.com
and can be found on Twitter @kathypooler
and on LinkedIn,
Google+, Goodreads and Facebook: Kathleen Pooler
One of her stories “The Stone on the
Shore” is published in the anthology: “The
Woman I’ve Become: 37 Women Share Their Journeys From Toxic Relationships
to Self-Empowerment” by Pat LaPointe, 2012. Another story: “Choices and Chances”
is published in the mini-anthology: “My Gutsy Story”
by Sonia Marsh, 2012.
