So last night Bob asked the more important question re my laser zapping experience – why at my age would I even care if I have a few brown spots on my face. Yes, that is the crux of the matter. I’m too old to care. It’s enough trying to look young already. And still I can’t help myself from doing it. Of course, I’ll never be too old to keep my face moisturized and out of the sun, but to actively do procedures to try to erase the ravages of age is totally ridiculous.
I’m getting to be so much like my mother, it’s embarrassing. I remember a time – very close to the time she died and she was well into her 90s. she was in the hospital and I was sitting by her bedside. And she kept looking at me and finally said, “You’re so beautiful. Look at me how old and wrinkled I look.” It was a nice compliment to me, but it showed how vain she still was at that age. I said that I was sure to look like her some day – just that I had a few more years to go.
And lately, when I look at myself I see more of her face in mine – the jowls, the wrinkles down the sides, the sagging lines under my chin. I definitely take after her – both in that vain attitude and in looks.
When I read Nora Ephron’s “I Feel Bad about My Neck” about a year ago, I wasn’t feeling all that bad about mine. But that’s gradually changing. I’m feeling worse and worse about it.
And, I need to stop and rejoice that I'm still here! I need to learn to accept the aging process – slowing down, widening through the middle, and liking how I look just as I am. I need to learn how to accept that I can’t continue at the fast and stressful pace I’ve been on at work much longer and that one of these days I’ll look like my mother looked in that hospital bed.
One of these days I’ll write about my workout routine. That’s a whole other issue I have to deal with. Let it suffice to say now that I do way more in my workouts than any 67-year old should ever do, and I’m still pushing to do more. And, the only person I’m competing with is myself. Now figure that one out!