Sunday, May 4, 2008

Another choice -- to let her go

Friends are a fragile subject. I’ve had some in my life since high school. I’ve lost so many throughout the years. And so many I’ve just let go for lack of nourishment. However, I do know that being a friend and having friends takes time and energy and just the pure will to be there when needed.

I’ve had a person in my life since before Bob and I were married – 38 years this month. And throughout that time our friendship has been up and down. In fact we’ve gone through several periods where we didn’t speak to or see each other because our lives just didn’t have any connections. Recently we saw each other again and spoke and seemed happy about resuming our friendship. But, I’ve always known this person to be a flake. She’s never one I could rely on to keep a commitment, and one I’ve known to always surface when she needed something from me. This last time I was hoping she had changed, and we perhaps had a chance for a friendship again.

But, no. I was wrong. So wrong that that I let her use me again – my own damn fault. I let her reel me in again because I wanted her back in my life along with her other family members who I often see and who are so dear to me.

Not anymore. I’ve let this person use me for the last time. We are done. And, writing those words -- we are done -- feels so right. I’ve no remorse, just a lesson about how much a friendship needs appreciation, nourishment, and respect. Our lives with our friends are too short for anything else.

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