And I'm so grateful to Belinda for answering my long list of questions. Here goes:
1.
What does the title of the book mean?
My
memoir explores the concept of change—despite a series of harrowing events that
demonstrate how quickly adventure and excitement can devolve into chaos and
despair, I believe that change, however merciless, is always the most profound
catalyst for personal development.
The
title of my book—Out of
Sync—captures the condition that
permeated all aspects of my life in the ten years following our expatriation to
the US in 2001. It began with our arrival at JFK International Airport on the
day of the 9/11 terrorist attacks against our host country. We were trapped in
that chaos for five days before, finally, making our connecting flight to San
Francisco. There, we were greeted by the people’s flag-waving show of
patriotism, which made us feel a lot more alien than we would have under normal
circumstances.
What’s
more, that tension spotlighted the preceding series of unnerving changes in my
life: a divorce that ended a twenty-year marriage, an empty nest (including my
daughter’s plan to live in Germany for a year as an au pair), an unexpected
romance that resulted in a rushed wedding to accommodate my new husband’s
professional opportunity in the States and, consequently, my enforced status as
a trailing spouse. Last, but by no means least, it was a sad day saying goodbye
to my country, friends, family and, especially, my children.
The
disparity between my restrictions and my husband’s privileges, on top of being
an outsider at that crucial time in America’s history, knocked my composure
right off its axis. Considering my previous top-level position in advertising,
I felt humiliated to be seen as ‘just a spouse.’ My incapacitated self-esteem
and my husband’s feelings of guilt put a strain on our new marriage at a time
when both our host and home countries were confronting fundamental changes of
their own. Things pretty much went downhill from there, on personal, national
and global levels. It would take ten years before my husband and I achieve some
sense of equilibrium again.
As one reviewer says, this book is more than a
"fish out of water" story. Nicoll layers her experience of living
(and working) in a new country with the other "out of sync" areas of
her life that seem to radiate out from the center-point of expatriation: out of
sync marriage, professional life, spiritual life, and, ultimately, feeling out
of sync with herself, as well.
My story
is set in the context of post-9/11 America and post-apartheid South Africa, so
I make a fair number of culture
comparisons, like cuisine and eating habits, leisure activities and holiday
traditions, as well as work ethics, corporate politics, and sociopolitical
circumstances. Culture shock,
including reversed culture shock thanks to some radical changes in South
Africa, is a significant theme. Another one is conflict—internal and external—our own quarrels mirroring the
political strife in each country as well as the global economic distress of the
time. I look at how relationships
(on personal, national and global levels) shift under stress and over time. I
explore some psychological components of
change: the process of acculturation that requires you to adapt your
behavior, communication, values and beliefs, as well as a search for identity driven by the need to belong.
3.
What was it like to write your book—how long did it take?
I was
really writing the book right from the start of our expatriation without
intending to do so, since my email newsletters to my friends and family over a
period of five to seven years form the bulk of my story. Even though I have a
background in advertising copywriting and people were urging me to write a
book, I only gave it serious consideration when circumstances forced another
career change on me.
It took
me three years of serious writing, revising and editing to shape the book.
Within three months of pitching the manuscript to agents, I had four calls for
submission. Sadly, I did not clinch a deal; I wasn’t too surprised, as rumors
of a skittish market had already been doing the rounds. When I decided to my
Masters of Fine Arts (MFA) in Creative Writing for fiction, I was granted one
semester in non-fiction, which I used as a revision of the total manuscript. At
that point self-publishing was, in my opinion, the sensible way to go.
4.
When you got discouraged, what helped keep you going? Did
you have a coach or support system?
I had
some nasty critiquing experiences before finding mentors and support groups
that suited my sensibilities, people who welcomed my outsider perspective of
their culture. My first mentor was important to the process because she was the
one who said, “Don’t you dare not write that story.” My second mentor was the
one who helped me shape the story. I also formed my own critiquing group. All
in all, my total network consisted of published writers, private coaches,
editors and psychologists. You can’t wish for better support and guidance than
that.
5.
Who should read your book?
- Men and women
- South Africans and Americans
- South African expatriates living in the USA, and American expatriates living anywhere in the world
- All expatriates, now matter where they are from, now matter where they find themselves now
- Anyone who can relate to the disruptive force of change, whether on a personal, social, or global level
- Any couple in a committed relationship
- People struggling with relationships of any kind
- People who have an open mind with regards to life, love, faith, relationships, career, expatriation, and global politics
- Adventurers who love traveling, locally and abroad
- All the footloose, fancy-free, rolling stones in the world
6.
What is your writing life like now? What are you working
on?
I try
and divide my time between some freelance copywriting and personal coaching,
marketing Out of Sync via my social
media networks and other outlets, and working on a creative writing guide and
my first novel. Ghostwriting a book about the life of an ex-marine is also on
the cards; I just need to find the time.
7.
Besides being a writer, you also work as a creativity
coach. What exactly is that and what services do you provide?
I
provide various services. As a life coach, I help people who are dealing with change, though I
don’t do much intervention work anymore. As a creativity coach, I
mostly help writers who are working on a big project, like a book. I also offer
creativity workshops, writing classes and manuscript critiquing.
Author
bio
Belinda Nicoll is originally from South
Africa. She expatriated to the US in 2001 and has been a citizen since 2010.
She holds a BA degree in Communication
and a Master of Fine Arts in Creative
Writing. She is the author of a memoir titled Out
of Sync. Belinda was a talent
agent and drama coach before venturing into the advertising world as copywriter
and client service director. These days, she works as a freelance writer and creativity
coach. Her works-in-progress are a novel, a guidebook on the craft of writing,
and she blogs about issues related to
writing and creativity, as well as her favorite subject: change.
You can
connect with Belinda here: website / blog / Facebook / Twitter / LinkedIn. And Out of Sync is available from
various online retailers.
10 comments:
Thanks for having me, Madeline. I'm delighted to be hosted here on Choices and by one of my favored memoirists.
Best,
Belinda.
Thanks for your target audience list. It might help me with mine Belinda. Madeline, I loved Belinda's memoir. You know how much the expat life means to me, and how I love to read about other adventures. Thanks for the interview.
Thanks, Belinda. The feeling is mutual of course.
Yes, Sonia, I loved Belinda's memoir too - and yours!
You're welcome, Sonia. We all learn, and draw inspiration, from each other. Thank you for your encouraging comments about my book.
- Belinda.
This is such an excellent interview Madeline and Belinda. It could be a template for writing and marketing a memoir. I especially appreciate Belinda's press kit and target audience list. I loved both your memoirs, not only enjoying them as stories but also taking valuable lessons from your writing. Thank you both!
Thanks so much, Kathy. Yes Belinda provided us with a wealth of information. It was such a delight to interview her.
And thanks for always coming back here with such wonderful support of my work.
I ditto your sentiments about Kathy's continued support, Madeline. I really can't wait to read your book, Kathy, but I guess you hear that all the time.
I'm really encouraged that you both deem my contributions valuable; it makes it all worth it.
Madeline and Belinda, spending my Sunday morning catching up on some reading. You both have gifted us with a thought-provoking and almost instructive interview on the process of writing and marketing a memoir. I was especially interested in reading Belinda's list of potential readers. It is always inspiring to read what the two of you have to share.
Thanks for spending your Sunday morning with us, Sherrey. It's always so great to see you here. Yes Belinda is very generous with her advice and counsel. I'm so honored to have her here.
I look forward to your post here tomorrow.
You're so welcome, Sherrey. We all learn from each other as we go along. I love sharing this wonderful process with my peers.
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