Meet Meryl Hartstein, the original Bounce Back Woman

I met Meryl Hartstein through Help A Reporter Out (HARO). She was looking for women who could write a piece for her up and coming anthology about Bounce Back Women. Since I certainly could relate to that subject, I answered immediately. Since then she has become my Facebook friend and fan, and I follow her on her Facebook page called Bounce Back Women. I have been a member of this group for about a year. Here is how Meryl describes her Bounce Back Women group: 

"This is a group for women who have "bounced back" from unimaginable adversities and have managed to live full successful lives! We are Mothers, Sport Heroes, Corporate CEOs, Doctors, Authors, Entertainers etc. Our one common thread is that we are extremely resilient. We are "Bounce Back Women"!!

I am pleased Meryl chose to write about aging - a subject near and dear to my heart. My next goal is to meet with her sometime soon on her home turf, New York City, so we can talk about it in person.

Growing Young

by Meryl Hartstein

Yes, the times they are a-changing. As far back as I could remember, I have been working on staying young. There were a few exceptions when I wanted to be older. One summer I was in Cape Cod with my parents and a friend. I was only 15. We met some boys who were older and I had to lie about my age. I also remember crossing the border from New Jersey into New York to go to a bar at 16. The drinking age was 18 at the time in New York. Most of the time, no one there got proofed (or like they say today, carded).

At the old age of 13, I started using moisturizer in hopes of preventing wrinkles. I would instinctively wear sunglasses all of the time in the summer. Protection was my only weapon.

My working out obsession also started young. This was before Jane Fonda was anything more than an actress and an activist. There weren't any videos to watch or any gyms available to us. My routine was strictly calisthenics, learned in gym class along with a little hula-hoop thrown in for fun.

I would read everything I could on the movie stars' secrets to looking young. I was more familiar with the names of cosmetic products than the names of the presidents. This didn't help when it came to taking tests.

As I grew older, the gadget-buying began. I had things called the Dermal Tone, Derma New, Derma Wand, Face Flex, Face Master, Rejuvinique, just to name a few. Each one came with some benefit but ultimately, none were the fountain of youth.

Fast-forward to the present. This is what I believe to be true. Aging is not a horrible affliction that is waiting to turn us into ugly, hideous people. It's a process of nature, something we will all have the honor of going through. It's a blessing. It's also a state of mind. We all have to age but we all don't have to grow old. Just as cats are believed to have nine lives, so can humans, and a lot more, if they so choose. We can reinvent and redefine who we want to be as many times as needed. We can change our looks, passions, causes and careers as we wish. We can expand our quality of living by making positive changes in our diets, exercise and emotional spirit. We are not limited. We can avoid surgeries with alternate methods.

Women are not scowled upon if they have long hair past 50. They can even keep up with the trends in fashions just like the women half their age. We are graced with the options of cosmetic surgeries and procedures to keep us feeling good about ourselves.

We no longer have to feel a stigma regarding aging. We should not fear it but embrace it. We cannot change it but we can celebrate it. We are forever growing young.

Meryl's bio

Meryl is a published author, strategic life and relationship coach, celebrity confidence expert, guest speaker, founder of “Bounce Back Women” a not-for- profit organization. Her list of accomplishments also include:

• Blogtalk Radio Show: Bounce Back Women
• Books: “Shine” Confidence for Women, Internally, Externally, Eternally (To be released in the fall)
• In development:  “Bounce Back Women” Stories of overcoming adversity. Comprised of stories from Celebrities, Olympians and other powerful women.
• Writer: Huffington Post
• Lifeafter50.com
• Women Rising
• Altruistic Beauty (working with Jacqueline Laurita, “Housewives of NJ”
• Board of Directors: Stage Left Children’s Theatre
• Board of Directors: walk4good.org

Find out more about Meryl here:

merylhartstein@yahoo.com

www.bouncebackwomen.com

Introducing my new writing friend, Deborah Kalan

Deborah and I met in Pilates class. We never said more than hello for about six months until one day I mentioned I had to rush away after class because I had a lot of work to do. She asked what I did, and when I said I am a writer, her eyes lit up. She said, “I’m a writer too.” And our friendship was off and running. I’ve read a lot of her stories, and I totally agree. She is a writer. I’m so happy to introduce her work to you.

My Writing Life

By Deborah Kalan

I have been writing seriously since my eleventh birthday when I received a leatherette diary the color of blue Irises. The diary was secured with a little strap that had a gold lock and two gold keys. On the front of it were the words “Dear Diary.” Each page was divided into five sections of about five lines, which in my 11-year-old mind, restricted me to extremely brief entries. 

In those days, I mostly wrote about boys. The cute ones, the creepy ones, the ones that liked me, the ones that I liked who didn’t like me. Because the blank pages were there, I felt compelled to write. I remember always feeling a sense of accomplishment, completion, when I finished my daily entry.

As my writing progressed, I wrote in a variety of journals, which I often spent hours choosing. A new journal is like a new beginning for me. The cover has to speak to me. The size and weight of it needs to feel just right. I often have two or more journals that I write in simultaneously. At one period in my life when I was going through a difficult time with my daughter, I had a “negative” journal and a “positive” one. It helped me to keep the bad karma in a separate place so that it wouldn’t spill over and spoil the good stuff.

In the beginning, along with journaling, I wrote children’s stories.  But, as my children grew and matured, I began to lose the child’s voice that was in me. It was then that my writing turned to grown up fiction, as well as essays and poetry. I knew I had a talent for writing, but because I rarely submitted my work and was not published, I had a difficult time calling myself a writer. One day I read something that said,  “if you write, you’re a writer.” I have since kept that as a sort of mantra for my self-identity. 

Other than my husband and my beautiful 91-year-old mother, who are my biggest fans, I rarely shared my writing with anyone. Just recently, through the encouragement of a dear friend of mine who is an accomplished author, I have begun to expose myself through my writing on various social network sights. After working on a piece, tweaking it, re-tweaking it, reading and rereading it, I paste it, and post it and swallow a satisfying gulp of achievement.  And then I wait. I check the sight every few minutes at first. Did anyone see it? Did anyone like it? Did they comment? And then the kudos start to come in. Sometimes there are a few comments. Sometimes a lot and sometimes none. It feels great to send my words out to the universe and hope that something I say, some group of words or stack of sentences might affect someone in a positive, reflective way. That’s when I know if I’m asked “what do you do”? I can casually and with great confidence say. “I’m a writer.”

About Deborah: The only problem with Deborah’s living arrangement is that I don’t get to see enough of her. I’m so happy to have this wonderful new friend in my life.

Deborah likes to describe her dual residences as living “bi-coastal.” She and her husband Harvey, of 41 plus years, and their “senior” dog Jackson, split their time between their homes in California. One is near the coast of Manhattan Beach and the other one is near the “coast” of Calabasas Lake. They have two grown and married children and two amazing grandchildren who are also Deborah’s devoted fans.

You can find Deborah on Facebook and read some of her stories on Storylane.